


Reditus

by vonsi



Category: Tenkuu no Escaflowne | The Vision of Escaflowne
Genre: F/M, Gaea - Freeform, Love, War, hitomiandvan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-23
Updated: 2020-11-27
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:13:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27677213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vonsi/pseuds/vonsi
Summary: Nightmares plague Hitomi, all too like the visions she once had. She tries to convince herself they're just dreams. She no longer had the power to sway Gaea's fate, did she? They're at peace, and she is no longer needed there. But the dreams feel all too real, and like Hitomi, a shadow of doubt pulls at Van's heart. How long will this peace last? Is a new evil brewing in Gaea? HxV
Relationships: Van Fanel/Kanzaki Hitomi
Kudos: 8





	1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Escaflowne

Chapter One: Night Terrors   
  


She woke abruptly, a strangled scream tearing out from her throat as she sat up in bed. Cold sweat drenched her body, but she felt on fire within, like she had just escaped the pits of hell itself. Trembling fingers clenched at the sheets twisted about her, the white fabric like the coils of a constricting anaconda. That scream turned into rapid pants, her mouth wide open as she gasped for air, her heart pounding, one of her hands coming to lay flat against her chest. The rapid beat was almost deafening, her fingers nearly bouncing with the tempo against her sternum. She felt it beating in her throat, making it more difficult to draw breath. The awful dreams flashed in her mind, her eyes only seeing the chaos and not the bedroom she occupied. She closed her eyes tightly, hoping to drive them out, but it was still too fresh to dispel.   
  


_Fire consumed the charred remains of an unknown city. Burning bodies littered the ground; soldiers, she knew, by their armor and weapons, and also civilians. The scattered debris of decimated corpses staggered her, bile rising in her throat. The listless eyes of the dead stared at her from where she stood in the midst of the burning storm, as if their deaths were her doing. Shrapnel from melefs spotted the ground, the evidence of the gruesome battle waging. She was in the midst of the war zone. She could hear the clashes of fighting off in the distance, accompanied by the bone chilling cries of people. In the distance something else also stirred. The ground beneath her quaked. Wide eyes turned to see what she already knew was coming. Dark, like the pitch black of a moonless night, it drew near, swathed in flames. Its mass rose, towering over her like a titan of lore. Fear gripped her more strongly than she had felt in years, stealing her strength away. The weight of such dread pulled her to her knees, her head craning back, watching as the monstrous form only continued to grow in size. In the swirling fog two crimson lights like eyes came into life, piercing through the veil of smoldering ash and right through her very soul. As it descended upon her, all she could do was to scream in horror, and in her heart she cried out for salvation from this evil.  
  
_

_Van!  
  
_

Hitomi reopened her eyes, not bothering to hold back the stinging tears that started to form. Her eyes and throat burned as if the fire from her dreams had been real. A deep, shuddering breath racked her body, her lips trembling. She couldn’t know how long she sat there, waiting for the fear to depart. For the tears to stop flowing. For her heart to slow its frantic race in her chest. But eventually, just as she knew it would, she calmed down until she was limp and exhausted, falling back down with a weary huff, still twisted in the sheets of her bed.   
  


“That dream, again, huh?” she mumbled to herself eventually, bleary emerald eyes looking up to the dark ceiling of her bedroom. Long, dim streaks of artificial lamplight bled in from outside to cast its fluorescent glow onto the walls; it was still dark out. She didn’t have the will to look at her clock, but she guessed it to be early morning. She always woke from such nightmares early in the morning around three o’clock, just a couple of hours before she normally roused for the day. The nightmares seemed to be a better alarm clock these days than her actual alarm. The collecting lost hours of sleep had already started taking their toll on both her body and her psyche. “How long are these dreams gonna last?” she questioned, but no one was there to answer her back, and she closed her eyes once more, sighing deeply.   
  


She had been having these dreams for a while now. Hitomi couldn’t recall exactly when they had first begun to switch from pleasant memories to these nightmares, but several months had now passed. She often had the night terrors at least two or three times a week now; sometimes more, and thankfully sometimes less. In the beginning they weren’t as frequent, just a few here and there throughout each month, like fleeting glimpses of memories from her past; but slowly they visited her more and more frequently, and their nature became more and more ominous, not memories at all but genuine nightmares. She often dreamt of Gaea since her return; happy memories of her friends and of the beautiful planet. Sometimes they were more troubling than others, the not so great memories of her adventures. Yet, they were nothing like these terrible dreams of late that reminded her too much of those visions she had had during her time there. But these were just nightmares, right? She was no longer in Gaea. No longer connected to that realm. These were merely dreams, not the visions she had had when conscious. Her dreams hadn’t foretold the future since her time in Gaea, and surely they hadn’t started again. She’d have been called back to Gaea by now if they had been visions, wouldn’t she have?  
  


This same series of questions and concerns following such night terrors played in her mind like a broken record as she tried to reassure herself anew.  
  


“They’re just dreams, Hitomi, nothing more,” she sighed for what seemed the umpteenth time as she untangled herself from her sheets, sat up and brought her legs over the edge of her bed. Her toes touched the cool wood flooring beneath her, causing a shiver to run through her. Where before she felt ablaze she suddenly felt chilled. The haunting eyes of those dead bodies flashed in her mind and she willed them away forcefully, standing up as she did. Maybe the cold would help keep the ghastly images at bay, so she bothered not with her robe. The young woman brought a hand up to run through her now long, sleep tousled hair as she made her way from her bedroom and out to her kitchen, focusing on the frigid air making her skin rise in goosebumps; anything to keep that fiery hell from her thoughts.   
  


She sat down at her small kitchen table, a half empty glass of water before her. Leaning heavily on one arm, she stared out a window and to the street below her apartment and what little she could see beyond through the gaps of the buildings, unable to help but ponder her dreams despite the anxieties they harbored. She couldn’t bother to go back to sleep lest she have the nightmares again. Her morning runs were at five-thirty, so she sat at her table, thinking about Gaea until it was time to get ready.

* * *

“Kanzaki-san?”  
  


Her name being said made her start a bit. Blinking away her thoughts, Hitomi focused her gaze on the slightly worried faces of three of her students. The warm, noon sunlight shone down upon the bleachers she currently sat on and basked the girl’s P.E. uniforms in its bright glow, making the sheen of the fabric look almost prismatic. She was supposed to be watching her students run laps, not get caught daydreaming by them. Hitomi’s lips tugged into a frown at herself for a moment, before she gave her students an inquisitive look.  
  


“What’s wrong?” she asked. The trio of girls fidgeted a bit, but then one boldly responded, throwing the question right back at Hitomi.  
  


“Nothing’s wrong with _us_ . What we want to know is what’s wrong with _you,_ Coach _.”_ The two other girls looked shocked and scared but not altogether surprised at their friend's audacious words, accustomed to the girl’s brazen mouth, Hitomi knew. Dark eyes stared into emerald belligerently, almost making Hitomi laugh.   
  


“Excuse me?” she nearly chuckled out, more amused than offended at the student’s familiarity with her. Other teachers would not be so lenient, Hitomi knew the girl knew. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have dared to ask her such a personal question in such an informal manner.   
  


“We want to know what’s wrong with you, Kanzaki-san; are you okay? Are you sick?” the girl questioned more, making Hitomi raise her brows a bit. “You just seem so… _out of it_ lately… You’re always daydreaming. You always look so tired…” The girl’s face softened. “We’re worried about you, Coach.”   
  


“Nakamura-san,” Hitomi breathed out, unsure if she should be flattered at her student’s worry or appalled at her audaciousness. Did she really look that bad? Hitomi’s slightly parted lips shut as she reminded herself of her position here, despite having been the girl’s coach for the last year and knowing her well. Sitting straighter, she schooled her expression. Seeing this change in her demeanor, the other two girls looked more nervous, but Nakamura stood her ground, unflinching. _At least my students care about me_ , she mused to herself for a moment.  
  


“While I appreciate your concern, I can assure you ladies that I am perfectly fine and that my well-being is not for you to worry over. I’ll forget that you’ve asked me such blatantly personal questions, Nakamura, but just this once.” Hitomi tried to not make herself sound too insensitive and the girl seemed to notice, holding her tongue despite wanting to retort. Her dark eyes looked more worried, but then she gave Hitomi a curt bow, the other two following suit, and then the trio excused themselves. As they scurried away from that awkward situation, Hitomi could hear the other two girls whispering to their friend in low, violent hisses.   
  


_“I can’t believe you asked her like that, Hisako!”  
  
_

_“For real! What were you thinking?! Kanzaki-san could have given us detention ‘til the end of the school year! Or worse, kicked you off the team!”  
  
_

_“No she wouldn’t.”  
  
_

_“Kohana is right, Hisako! You were supposed to be more subtle._ Subtle! _”  
  
_

_“Oh, give it a rest, Emiko; you guys are just jealous you don’t have the balls to ask stuff like I do.”  
  
_

_“Is that what you call it?! I thought it was simply a death-sentence…”  
  
_

Their laughing voices at that comment faded away, Hitomi watching their backsides contemplatively, thinking about her companionship with Yukari during their high school years. But the sentiment was fleeting, and Hisako’s worried expression flashed in her mind.  
  


_I must be getting worse if my students are noticing and have the courage to say something right to my face,_ Hitomi groaned to herself, hanging her head a bit. _Damn these nightmares._ Doing her best to look more lively, Hitomi closed her eyes and took a deep breath, looking up at the sun and letting the warmth fall on her face, hoping that might help. _Pull yourself together, Kanzaki. You don’t have time to daydream while you’re at work._ Looking back down and to the watch strapped about her left wrist, she checked the hour. The period was almost over. _Right, time to ‘round ‘em up, then_. In a swift movement, Hitomi rose to her feet, looking out over the field to the gaggle of highschoolers in the distance with a little grin on her face. Using the whistle hanging around her neck, she gave two curt blows on the thing to get their attention, signaling the students that it was time to get ready for their next class, and for Hitomi to ready herself for her next batch of students for the day. Hopefully the next hour wouldn’t see her students trying to solve the mysteries of the ever-present fatigue and absent-mindedness that clouded Hitomi as of late.

* * *

Despite the recurring nightmares she had been having, her life had been pretty peaceful since returning to Earth. Finishing high school, entering a college she wanted to attend and finishing her degree in education and kinesiology was a breeze. Hitomi supposed that in comparison to all the trouble she experienced on Gaea, everything she had been doing on Earth was child’s play. While her friends and other classmates groaned, Hitomi endured with confidence and dedication. But there was no grand scheme for her career, she had decided early on, unlike her friends. She had been quite the celebrity on Gaea. Back on Earth, she didn’t want such attention. So her current job as a Physical Education teacher and Track and Field coach at a local high school was just the place she wanted to be. Not the doctors or lawyers or biochemists her friends had gone to school to become, many still studying and working on their graduate degrees and beyond. No, Hitomi was perfectly content with her quaint little life, despite her friends’ protests. Thankfully Yukari had been more understanding.  
  


Hitomi’s second and permanent return to Earth from Gaea wasn’t like her first when time had backtracked. She returned after being away for so long. This time she couldn’t hide it. Yukari and Amano had even spoken to her mother, Hitomi had found out, who told her friends about her grandmother’s experience of traveling to another world and meeting a strange man who gave her a pendant during a summer festival. So all three of them knew, and so Hitomi had told them everything. If they themselves hadn’t seen their friend taken by a beam of light up into the air with a strange boy flying a strange dragon like machine, Hitomi knew they’d think her insane. Yukari and Amano had sworn to never divulge these secrets to anyone else, the same as her mother, as well as father and brother who had also been privy to the reason for her disappearance. It wasn’t long after that Hitomi urged Yukari to pursue Amano, knowing her friend had been as infatuated with their upperclassman as she had been. Time in Gaea had changed her heart. Amano had no longer held her attention. No, that had been taken by a young king on another planet. Thus, Yukari and Amano struck up a relationship. But fate was always a funny thing, and in the end Amano still ended up moving to England with his family and hadn’t returned since, and had no plans to. He and Yukari had tried to strike up a long-distance relationship but to no avail. Yukari, though, decided she had bigger dreams for her life than to mourn their break-up.  
  


So, while Hitomi’s life was, all things considered, peaceful and quiet, the same couldn’t be said about Yukari's. The former high-school track manager wanted to continue her relationship with the world of sports. She studied business marketing and administration at university and with her husband she met in the field, managed various minor league sports teams. They were very well off and with a baby on the way. Yukari was always busy, still working hard even with the pregnancy, and Hitomi saw little of her friend these days. All of Hitomi’s other friends were getting paired off and married, too, many with their own bundles of joy soon coming. Even Hitomi’s younger brother, Mamoru, had a serious girlfriend he planned on proposing to in the future, the young man currently studying engineering, high hopes placed on his shoulders, his future career very promising.   
  


And that left Hitomi - twenty-three, never managing to keep a long-term relationship, and uninterested in settling down nor aspiring for grandeur dreams like her friends and brother. But this was exactly how Hitomi wanted it. No drama. No chaos. Just simplicity. Yukari was one of the few who understood why, and Hitomi was exceedingly grateful for her constant support.

Then, the nightmares started.   
  


To say she hadn’t thought of returning to Gaea would be a lie. Hitomi longed to see her friends. So many fond memories she wished to relive. But she didn’t belong there, and Van still had her pendant. She didn’t think she’d ever go back so long as he had that gem. That was why she had given it to him. And in the eight years she had been back home she never once felt that pull. Never saw anything out of the ordinary. And Hitomi had given up on the tarot card readings completely. Threw her deck away when she returned home and swore to never use it again, lest her readings become true, good fortune or not. Even with the nightmares nothing had changed in that regard. But this was how it was meant to be. Despite her desire to see her friends and a certain king, such sentiments were dangerous. She couldn’t allow the strange power of her emotions and wishes to sway Gaea once again, not after the peace they fought so hard for. The nightmares she had been having were indeed a bad omen for that peace, but Hitomi told herself again and again that they were simply dreams.   
  


_Gaea is fine… you’re fine… It will pass, and we can all keep living our peaceful, easy lives…_

* * *

Author's Notes: Gasp, I'm back with a brand new fic! *flinches at the anger from my viewers* I apologize to my Turgid and Sanguineous readers. I've no muse for those stories, sadly, but haven't given up.

I recently thought about Escaflowne the movie. I saw it a long time ago and remembered really liking it. I decided to watch the anime. I know both are drastically different. I promptly fell in love with the anime, too, the themes, Gaea. I couldn't help but be inspired to write a fic from this amazing series.

Like with my other stories, feel free to point out any mistakes. I use no betas, and just write for fun.

Don't be like me, guys, and juggle three fics at once.


	2. Shadow of Doubt

Disclaimer: I do now own Escaflowne

Chapter Two: Shadow of Doubt  
  


The rustling of leaves and the trill of birdsong filtered into his ears. Eyes closed to the world, he let himself slip in and out of consciousness as sleep threatened to pull him into its embrace. But the feather light touch of the tall grass on his skin kept pulling him back into wakefulness. Not that he minded. He shouldn’t even be out here, he ruefully admitted to himself, but that didn’t stop him from slipping away from his duties now and then to enjoy some well-deserved peace and quiet. His advisors would be annoyed, but he was the king - he could do as he wished. They didn’t always share that same attitude, he reminded himself with a small smirk. Regardless, he still found himself coming to the shrine more and more frequently these days to escape the hounding of the Samurai Generals and his other advisors.   
  


Willing his eyes to open, the young king watched the lazy white clouds above crawl across the sky through the canopy of the surrounding trees. He sometimes wished he could join them, escape the tethers of his humanity and be free of the duties as the King of Fanelia. But of course such a whimsical fantasy wasn’t meant to be, and he could never cast aside his fate as ruler of this small kingdom; he loved Fanelia too much to abandon her. Worked too hard for peace, to rebuild her, to strengthen ties with their allies to walk away now. Still, it was sometimes fun to daydream what it might be like to give it all up and live free from his responsibilities.   
  


Lifting his arm up, Van watched as the pink pendant swayed from its gold chain entwined about his fingers, mesmerized by its beauty. The sunlight glinted prettily off the smooth stone, radiant and almost blinding at times. Mahogany eyes looked at the thing bittersweetly, unable to help but recall the last time he saw the previous owner of the pendant here in this very spot at the shrine. He turned his head to look over to the sentient guymelef for a moment where it stood basked in the cool shade of the trees, statuette, and more memories filtered through his head. Five years had passed since then, and so much had changed in that short time. But of course one thing hadn’t; Hitomi was still gone and Escaflowne was still dormant.   
  


_ Just as they should be, _ he thought to himself, turning his head to look back at the pendant.  _ Hitomi is safe on the Mystic Moon… and Escaflowne... _ His lips pulled into a frown, not wanting to finish the thought that tried to creep into his mind. Sighing deeply, Van brought his arm back down, pendant still wrapped in his hand. The necklace both comforted and troubled him, but he rarely parted with the thing, always keeping it on his person. A little piece of Hitomi with him at all times. A constant reminder of her time on Gaea. He supposed he was being masochistic by wearing the pendant, rather than keeping it locked away someplace. Perhaps, a part of him kept it on his person because he hoped for her return. Van frowned once more, pushing such desire from his mind and heart.  
  


A presence tickling the edges of his senses pulled him from his thoughts. He knew who it was without needing to look. That frown turned into a small smile, feeling as it grew nearer, the owner attempting to be stealthy. But ever since Hitomi had taught him how to see the unseen, his abilities to sense the presence of others was uncanny in its accuracy. He pretended he didn’t notice even though he was sure the one prowling knew he knew they were there, and Van waited for them to pounce. They didn’t disappoint.  
  


“Lord Van!” Out of the tall grass the lithe frame of Merle sprang forth, landing at his side. “I had a feeling you’d be here,  _ again _ .” He almost flinched at the way she stressed the word ‘again’ with her tone and the accusations it held, but he was growing more accustomed to them. “They’ve been looking for you.” By ‘they’ he knew she meant the Samurai Generals. Van pursed his lips. Merle must have seen because she gave a little laugh. Never one to be abashed at intimate contact, Merle laid herself down on his right, wrapping her arms about his like she always had. If not for their platonic relationship and his thinking of her like a younger sister, the matured body of the cat girl molded against his side would have made him uncomfortable. But her familiar touch did the opposite, calming his nerves a tad. Merle was at least still a constant, and always on his side. Well, almost always.  
  


“You’re not gonna rat me out, are you, Merle?” he accused, and he felt her stiffen a bit in indignation.   
  


“I’d never do that,” she retaliated, her voice like a hiss. Van smiled unseen to her.   
  


“Do you know what they want?” he dared to ask her, though he had his suspicions. She stiffened again.  
  


“There is a new  _ guest _ coming tomorrow.” By the way she said it, this new guest sounded more like an enemy soon to arrive. “Cesario is sending one of their  _ princesses _ here with her convoy. What was her name again… Princess… bah, I’ve forgotten which one,” she quipped, and Van couldn’t help the small chuckle that escaped him.  
  


“Ah. Yes. They reminded me last week. They want me to prepare for their arrival, I’m sure.” He sounded enthused in the least.   
  


“Lord Van…” He made a hum of acknowledgement. “This is the fourth one to come,” Merle commented; there was worry in her voice.   
  


“So it is,” he remarked. He felt her hands tighten around his arm.  
  


“What are you going to do, Lord Van?” Her choice of words sounded careful; he knew why. She was trying to tread upon rough waters and breach a subject she knew she was supposed to avoid.  
  


“What do you mean?” Van felt his chest tighten a bit as he tried to feign ignorance. He should have known she wouldn’t give up so easily. Merle suddenly moved and he watched as she pushed herself up onto her side so she could hang over him, her face hovering over his own. A look of frustration marked her exotic features.   
  


“What do I mean?” The young woman made a sound like a growl in the back of her throat out of frustration. “You know  _ exactly _ what I mean, Lord Van…” Van turned his head away from her knowing gaze, unable to look her in the eye. “These princesses mean nothing to you.”  
  


“Merle,” Van warned her, the word coming out like a sigh, but inside him anger brewed.   
  


“They don’t deserve you, Lord Van. These princesses care nothing for you.”  
  


“Merle,” he warned her again, anger seeping into his voice now, but he still did not look her way. The cat woman brought her hands to grab him about his shoulders, trying to get him to look her in the eye.   
  


“It’s true and you know it. They simply want the title of ‘Queen’. The only one who actually deserves that title, who actually  _ loves you _ is Hi-”  
  


“Don’t say it, Merle,” Van abruptly barked out, rising up to sit and making the girl lean away from him quickly. A look of warning was on his handsome face, dark eyes holding her blues and unwavering. Merle inched away from him a bit more, taken aback by the vehemence on his face and in his tone. It wasn’t often she stood her ground with him like she currently was. She realized the gravity of her words, but there was still a defiant gleam in her eyes. This had never been an easy topic of discussion.  
  


“Lord Van-”  
  


“She’s  _ gone _ , Merle. She’s been gone for five years and she  _ isn’t  _ coming back. I sent her home for good, and I never want her to return to Gaea. How many times do I have to tell you?” He clutched his hand more tightly around the pendant in his hand. Seeing the hurt that was growing on Merle’s face at his rage sobered him a bit, and he looked away from her, torn between feeling ashamed at his outburst and his frustrations at the cat girl. Merle slowly got to her feet and took a step back, collecting herself, willing the tears that stung her eyes to remain unshed. She knew that anger wasn’t meant for her even though it hurt. A little huff of a laugh that sounded mocking escaped her, causing him to finally look back up to her. She shook her head gently at him.  
  


“You can lie to others, Lord Van, and you can lie to yourself.” Her voice was low, anger edging the words. Those cerulean eyes flicked down to his hand where it was blocked from view by his leg and the grass, but she knew all too well what was clutched in that hand. She met his eyes once more, and a mulish expression still marred Van’s features. “You can’t lie to me. I’ve told you before that I know you too well. If you have anyone to be angry at, it’s yourself.” She turned away before he could retort and began to leave. As she reached the treeline she paused, and turned her head enough for him to hear her over the sounds of nature. “The Generals are expecting you,  _ Your Highness _ ,” she reminded him, her tone formal and slightly condescending as she addressed him. “I recommend you not keep them waiting.” Merle continued on and disappeared into the trees, leaving the king to himself once more. When he could feel her presence fading, Van closed his eyes and fell back into the grassy earth heavily with a harried sigh, willing his pulse to slow.  
  


“Damn that, Merle,” he mumbled, anger boiling inside him again as he replayed their conversation over in his head. He refused to acknowledge her words as truth, even if in the far reaches of his conscience he knew her to be right. Looking over at the fabled guymelef sharing the clearing, Van frowned more deeply.   
  


“She can’t come back. She doesn’t belong here. Gaea isn’t safe,” he muttered these same words he had been telling himself repeatedly for the last five years. “I don’t know why, but I feel like this peace is temporary. I feel like something is stirring, but I don’t know what… I’m probably just being paranoid...” He studied the Ispano Guymelef, his expression troubled, hoping to find the answers to his questions. “What do you think, Escaflowne?”   
  


The guymelef of course did not respond, and merely knelt there, quiet and unmoving.

* * *

“There you are, Your Highness! We’ve been looking for you.”   
  


Van tried not to look sheepish in front of the general approaching him, reminding himself that he had every right as king to seek the solace of a quiet afternoon. Still, he hated to make them worry, even if their constant pestering was a nuisance to his sanity.  
  


“My apologies, Ezra. I didn't mean to worry you. What is it you wanted to speak of?”  
  


“My King, Princess Gianna of Cesario and her convoy should be arriving here tomorrow afternoon. Arrangements have already been made in the palace for their arrival. You need to prepare yourself, as well, Sire.” Van laughed a little, making the general frown slightly at his nonchalance.  
  


“They’re not arriving until tomorrow, General. It won’t take me an entire day to prepare myself.”  
  


“That may be true, my King, but still-”   
  


“Don't fret, General; I will be ready for their arrival tomorrow. But right now, I’m late for my match with Captain Saburo.”  
  


“But, my King-”  
  


“King Van,” another deep voice sounded out down the hall of the corridor they walked. A tall, well built man stepped out of the training room Van once studied in with Balgus. Though not nearly as tall as Balgus, Saburo still dominated the corridor with his height compared to Van and Ezra.   
  


“Captain Saburo,” Van greeted him. “Pardon my tardiness.” Ezra pursed his lips but held his tongue. Saburo bowed to the king, long dark hair falling over his shoulder with the action.   
  


“Apologies are not necessary, Your Highness. Please, take all the time you need to prepare.” A smile graced Van’s lips and he nodded in return, stepping past the taller man and into the room he emerged from. Ezra eyed Saburo, mouth still in a frown.   
  


“The King is still too lackadaisical when it comes to choosing a bride,” Ezra commented quietly to the captain. Though not one of the four Samurai Generals, Saburo was sought after for his wise counsel as a tactical leader and was held in high esteem for his swordsmanship. Such accomplishments and skill earned him his position as a captain, and as one of Van’s confidants. Van also chose him as his sparring partner. Saburo had trained under Balgus for a time, and it showed in his prowess with a sword. “I hope you are doing your part, Captain, to push him in the right direction. Fanelia needs a Queen and an heir. He has been putting this off for too long.”  
  


“The King will choose a Queen in due time, General Ezra,” he returned, always careful to address the Generals with their due respect. Still, Ezra always got the impression that Saburo thought himself of higher status than him. “As time has proven, our advice will not pressure him to settle on a choice. He is still young; there’s no rush.” Ezra scowled more deeply. Saburo was too lenient with the King. Seeing his impatience, the captain added, “But yes, I will do what I can to encourage him to finally choose a bride, General.”  
  


“See that you do, Captain.” With that command, Ezra turned on his heel and departed. Behind his back, Saburo grinned to himself and refrained from rolling his eyes.  


* * *

Sweat dripped from his hairline, trailing down his temples. His mouth was agape as he panted, trying to gain his breath after their latest round. He was certain the hit Saburo landed on his left thigh was already turning blue; it throbbed, and Van ignored the pain. He wondered if the one he gave to Saburo on his left forearm would likewise come into black and blue fruition. Van doubted it; the man was built like a mountain. Gloved hands on his knees, he rose his head to look through his hair at his opponent. Saburo looked barely out of breath, a testament to his stamina and strength. Van was lucky to have a sparring partner and Captain like him.   
  


“That’s enough for today, My Lord,” Saburo commented, and Van didn’t protest. They had been at it for over an hour now. He was spent. Abandoning ceremony, Van slumped down to the ground, his bottom hitting the wooden floor with a little  _ thump _ . He didn’t see Saburo’s little smirk. Setting his sword down at his side, the young king looked back up to the captain, a grin on his lips.   
  


“That was excellent, Saburo. I feel a lot better, now,” Van admitted, using the back of his hand to wipe away the sweat on his face. Saburo rose a brow at those words.   
  


“Has something been bothering you, My Lord?” Van hesitated, not wanting to worry his captain.   
  


“No, I simply meant that I was feeling a little restless and it was nice to expend some energy. Our matches never disappoint.” Saburo watched him curiously for a moment; the man, like Merle, often knew how to read him when others could not, knowing his true emotions. Van thought maybe he’d pressure him further, but the captain only smiled and bowed curtly.   
  


“Your kind words flatter me, Your Highness. They are not deserved. I’m honored to aid in any of your struggles, King Van.” A snort made the older man look up to Van once more.   
  


“Don’t be so formal with me, Saburo,” Van sighed out with a little laugh, leaning back onto his hands behind him. “Not when we’re alone. I hate all the ceremonious bullshit all the time. Drives me insane.” The king’s head fell back as he finished speaking, and then eventually his arms slid out from behind him until he was splayed out on the floor. Saburo fought the urge to laugh.   
  


“If anyone finds you sprawled out like that they’ll think you’re dead. I’ll be executed on the spot.” Van snorted again.   
  


“Like anyone here in Fanelia could match you with a sword.” A soft chuckle escaped the captain.  
  


“Only you, my King.” Van smiled, and then sat himself up once more, his racing heart slowing down finally. His legs drew in slightly and he bent over, resting his forearms on his knees. Saburo studied the young king, admiring the change he had made from a lanky boy of fifteen at his coronation, to the strong, sure man he was now. A fine king he had become. But lately, he seemed more distant; distracted. Even now there was a look in his eyes that spoke of worry despite the little smile still pulling at his lips. His temper was shorter of late. He spent more and more time fleeing to the solitude of the shrine, or other places he could find to avoid interacting with others. His savageness during their sparring sessions was growing, the young king merciless in his attacks. Funny how Balgus once chastised him that he lacked the intent of a killing strike. Now, every swing of his blade held the full intent of death for his opponent. He would never say it, but even now his hands were sore from thwarting off the king’s attacks. Saburo didn’t know what it was, but something was troubling the king. He didn’t want to intrude, but his duty and genuine worry for the younger man urged him to pry once more.  
  


“Are you sure that you’re okay, my Lord? You’ve seemed troubled lately.” Van glanced up at him again. Saburo didn’t expect him to answer and to blow off his inquiry like he usually did. Van frowned, weighing the options of telling the man about the worry that had been plaguing him these days. The king trusted Saburo like he had trusted Balgus, a reliable confidant, and one of the few he felt he had. And Van knew he needed to speak to someone other than his own mind, or he might start losing his sanity. Telling Saburo would be best, he decided.  
  


“Saburo… we’ve been at peace for five years, now. Fanelia is rebuilt. Our ties with the allied countries are strong. Trade is stable and our economy is flourishing.”   
  


“Fanelia is the gem of the West. She is even more grand today than she once was; it’s all thanks to you, King Van.” Van pursed his lips at the praise, but his expression was still sober.   
  


“Everyone thinks this peace will last.”  
  


“You don’t think so, Sire?” Van closed his eyes and sighed, running a hand through his wayward hair.  
  


“I don’t know… Zaibach is no more. Nothing has been suspicious in the last five years.”   
  


“What worries you, then?”  
  


“I just… feel like I sense something wrong… A shadow of doubt looming in the back of my mind…” He laughed suddenly, but Saburo frowned at the king. “I’m probably just being paranoid.”   
  


“There’s nothing wrong with being weary. It would be unwise to let down our guard completely. But, still… We are at peace, my Lord. I see nor sense no signs of war to come.” Despite the words of comfort, Van still looked unconvinced. Trying to lighten the mood, Saburo added, “the only battle to be fought is the one with your advisors for the matter of your future Queen.” Van’s expression turned grim and Saburo laughed at the look of horror there.   
  


“I’d rather face war again,” he admitted, making the other man laugh once more.   
  


“Love and War… they are both difficult battles to face. Don’t let your advisors and the Generals force you into something, my Lord. In these peaceful times there is no rush... But a beautiful Queen would be a nice finishing touch for Fanelia, don’t you agree?”   
  


“You sound like an old match-maker, Saburo,” Van quipped, a little twinkle returning to his eyes.  
  


“Perhaps. But I still think it to be true.” The older man approached the king and reached out his hand. Van took it, and the other helped him to his feet. Placing his hand on the younger’s shoulder, Saburo gave it a squeeze. “Gaea is a peace; peace we all fought hard for. Do try and enjoy it, won’t you, Van?” 

* * *

Author's Notes:

I'm being nice and posting the second chapter earlier than I had wanted. :)

Hope you guys are enjoying the beginning. And yes, this chapter title is the same as the song of the same name from the series. Probably still my favorite piece composed for the show. I thought it fitting, the emotion the song brings out fitting for the fear Van has been feeling trying to creep into his heart.

We will see more of Hitomi next chapter. :)


	3. Opposing Advances

Disclaimer: I do not own Escaflowne

Chapter Three: Opposing Advances

Hitomi hoisted up her duffle bag off the ground, hanging it over her shoulder with a little huff of exertion, the muscles of her arms and legs sore. The dojo was bustling with energy and the soft, chattering voices of the other students. The mood was light and no longer serious now that their lessons were done for the evening. It made her laugh to herself that while she had become a teacher, here in the dojo she was still just a student. But it wasn’t difficult to place herself back into that role every time she stepped foot into the building, donning her karategi uniform and mentally preparing herself for the lessons to come. She always looked forward to them. They helped her escape from the nagging worry of her nightmares, even if it was only for a while. 

Not long after her return from Gaea, Hitomi knew she wanted to enroll herself at a dojo. For all of her skills she had displayed on the other planet, self-defense was certainly not one of those. She never wanted to have to be such a burden to others again, constantly having to be rescued and protected. Constantly relying on others. Hitomi wanted to be able to protect herself with her own two hands. Of course, she was no longer on Gaea, but Earth had its own dangers. Over the years her dedication to studying karate and dabbling in kendo paid off on more than one occasion. While she wasn’t of the highest ranks yet, Hitomi was a very promising practitioner of the martial art. Her skills helped thwart off many fights in high school. Creepy men trying to hit on her and Yukari on their nights out on the town. Breaking up fights between her own students at school. Yes, it was a very useful set of skills to have learned. 

_ And if I ever return to Gaea… _ Hitomi halted those thoughts in her mind before they could try and take root. Such thoughts distracted her from noticing someone approach her from behind.

“Hey, Kanzaki,” a smooth voice practically purred behind her, making the woman stiffen despite herself. Her head turned to meet the face of one of the assistant instructors that worked at the dojo.

“Sugimoto-sempai,” she returned, trying to keep her voice aloof and uninterested, but still treating him with the respect he deserved within the dojo. Hitomi disliked the way his eyes roved down her front before coming back up to meet her own, but she pretended not to notice. He smirked as if reading her thoughts, undeterred by her cool demeanor.

“You’re getting better and better, Kanzaki. When are you going to take the next step up, hmm? You’re ready to advance.” Hitomi rolled her eyes, unable to stop herself. Sugimoto chuckled at the response. “I’m serious.”

“I’m not ready to advance just yet,” she replied, the strong desire to step away from him rising within her, but she made herself stand her ground. To back away would mean to admit weakness. Admit that his proximity affected her. “Besides, I come here to enjoy myself, to learn and to grow. Not to compete. I’m happy with my current rank, thank you.” 

“Hmm. If you say so… When are  _ we _ gonna spar again, Kanzaki? I've been dying to test your strength. It’s been too long.” 

“Careful what you wish for, Sugimoto-sempai,” she replied, her voice and demeanor still aloof, but there was a little hint of warning there and in her eyes. “I may just be better than you think and wipe the floor with your ass.” The man chuckled, a decidedly attractive sound she couldn’t deny. 

“I wouldn’t mind if you’re the one to do it, Kanzaki. There’s nothing more sexy than a woman that can kick a man’s ass.” Hitomi breathed a little ridiculous laugh through her nose, watching the smile that spread wider on his lips, trying not to let her eyes linger on the movement. Sugimoto was definitely very attractive; Hitomi wasn’t blind. But he was the type of man who never committed to a single woman, always jumping between them like they were a pair of shoes he could change at his whim. The type of man she really had no patience for, even if sometimes his advances were tempting. She knew the rumors well enough to keep him at bay. But, it had been nearly a year since her last relationship, and Hitomi sometimes wondered what it might feel like to be ensnared by those strong arms of his, if only for a night. Schooling her thoughts before they lead her too far down that path, Hitomi let her lips curl into the tiniest of smirks. 

“Some other time.” She turned away from him after offering a curt bow, ending their conversation before he could reply. Hitomi didn't need to look to know the little pout that graced his features at her rejection, the same fake hurt he wore for any woman smart enough to keep their distance. Thanking the other instructors and making parting words to a few friends, she left the dojo, intimately aware of a pair of eyes following her every move. 

* * *

“Goodness, Hitomi, you’re going to be single forever if you keep this up.”

The half laughing, half serious voice of Yukari made Hitomi grin as she leaned further into her couch, tucking her phone more firmly against her shoulder and ear. 

“I can’t stand men like him; he’s such a sleaze. I couldn’t do that to my dignity and stoop so low.”

“Even for just one date? You never know. You might be surprised.”

“No!” Hitomi laughed in response to her friend’s pestering. 

“Okay, okay. I’m just joking.”

“Uh-huh. Sure you are.”

Hitomi let her head fall back against the cushions of her couch, half aware of the sound of a television program playing on her tv as she listened to Yukari’s laughter. It was good to talk to her again, even if it were just a phone call. But Yukari was out of town so she couldn’t visit her in person until she got back. That was, if her busy schedule would allow it. 

“I miss you, Hitomi,” Yukari sighed out wistfully. “It’s been too long since we chatted in person. I can’t wait to see you again. I’ve bought so many cute baby clothes and want to show you. We’ll meet for a lunch date when I get back!”

“Aww, I’d love that. I miss you, too. I can’t wait to meet the baby. Have you decided on a name for him, yet?”

“No, not yet. Isao and I are still rifling through some. He’s pickier than me,” she admitted, voice exasperated. Hitomi grinned at the expression she could picture on her friend’s face. The two women shared more laughter, and then Yukari sighed again.

“Oh, Hitomi; it’s your turn to meet someone special.” Yukari couldn’t see her roll her eyes at that comment. 

“Maybe one day,” she placated. “For now, I’m pretty content with the single lifestyle.” 

“Unless, of course, you could see a  _ certain someone _ again?” That topic was always one Yukari loved to tease Hitomi about. Hitomi brought a hand to her face and groaned. 

“Ugh,  _ Yukari _ . Don’t bring  _ him _ up.”

“Sorry, sorry. I couldn’t help myself... You’re  _ still _ hung up over him, aren’t you? Even after all these years.” Hitomi didn’t respond to the accusation. “I’m sorry, girl, but you’ve gotta move on. That chapter of your life is over. You’re not in that  _ other world _ , anymore. You gotta focus on the one around you. On  _ Earth. _ ”

“I know,” she replied curtly, her voice perturbed. Yukari sounded like a broken record. She reminded Hitomi this truth often enough that it was getting more and more annoying each time she brought it up. “I’m not  _ hung up _ on him, Yukari. There’d be no point, anyway. It’s not like I can go back…” Hitomi sighed deeply, running her hand through her hair. Her voice was solemn, and Yukari could hear the disappointment despite the words Hitomi spoke. Yukari knew that in the far reaches of Hitomi’s heart she longed to return to Gaea even if she would never admit it. “I’m just... not looking for anything serious, yet. Is that so bad? Can’t I be single? I’m still young. You act like I’m a decrypt old maid or something.” Yukari laughed again at that response despite herself.

“I’m sorry. Of course you can. I’m not trying to rush you. I love you, Hitomi. You’re my best friend. I just want to see you happy. That’s all.” Hitomi’s face softened. 

“I know you do, Yukari. I appreciate it.” A part of her wanted to tell Yukari about the dreams she had been having, but when Yukari called that night, Hitomi couldn’t find the right moment to tell her. Yukari already worried about her enough as is, she didn’t want to make her even more concerned. Perhaps she would tell her over their promised lunch, but for now, she wanted to keep their conversation light and veer away from the topic of Gaea and her love life.

* * *

_ “Presenting Her Royal Highness Princess Gianna of Cesario!” _

The torrent of sounds bombarding his ears was deafening as the procession filtered into the throne room. Van made himself look attentive for the sake of decorum, but inside he was already wishing he could sneak away. Those mahogany eyes dutifully watched as the princess was led inside in all of her finery up towards the dias that his throne resided upon. On either side of him, two of his Samurai Generals stood guard. The rest of the large room was crammed full of people, making the space feel stuffy, the air stagnant with breath despite its girth and tall ceilings. As the party drew near he noted the opulent style of Cesarian garb, the different blues and golden highlights contrasting with the more earthen tones of Fanelia. Cesario was a coastal kingdom, its capital, like Palas, near the water. The color of their clothing reflected the tones of the ocean and the golden sun in the sky above. When the procession finally stopped and the music died down, Van watched as the Cesarian guards leading the procession stepped aside so he could see the princess in all of her splendor, and she did not disappoint. She was a beauty, indeed, just like the others had been. Long, auburn hair and eyes like cut sapphire met his dark gaze. He saw them widen a bit as she looked upon him for the first time, a small touch of red coloring the porcelain skin of her face. Van couldn’t help the smile that formed on his lips. Her eyes faltered from his after a moment. His smile turned into a smirk at his ability to already fluster her thusly. Before the silence could drag on, Van rose to his feet, taking a few steps away from his throne. Like the princess being presented to him, he too was dressed in all the finery of his station. He loathed it, but ignored his distaste for now. 

“Fanelia bids you welcome, Princess Gianna of Cesario,” he announced. “I am pleased at your safe arrival.” Rather than the princess herself respond, an emissary stepped forwards to answer in her place. Such tradition annoyed him.

“Your Royal Highness, King Van Fanel of Fanelia; the Princess thanks you for your kind words. We are honored to be here in the splendid kingdom of Fanelia. You have outdone yourself on rebuilding her. She is more stunning than before.” Van fought the urge to laugh at such a lie. Only Fanelians truly loved her rustic beauty. Despite the efforts they put into rebuilding the valley kingdom anew, Van knew the other nations of Gaea still thought of his homeland as a backwater country. They only sent their princesses his way because of his reputation in the war and the constant pestering of his advisors. He found it somewhat amusing that they were so adamant to continue a Draconian bloodline where before his kind were loathed. But, he was thankful that his ancestry no longer rewarded him with so much scorn and he could take pride in his mother’s blood.

“Your words flatter me. We are very proud of Fanelia, and hope that during your stay here, you will enjoy her beauty and all she has to offer.” Van turned his gaze back to Gianna, whose deep blue eyes were still a bit wide as she looked up at him, longing in their depths. Longing for him, or longing for a place atop the dias with a crown on her head and the kingdom at her feet? Van momentarily glanced to the crowds standing at the bottom of the dias, and he caught Merle’s eyes watching him intently. They held the other’s gaze for a brief moment, before Merle looked purposefully away, her face still showing her emotions about their moment at the shrine the day before. That pit of anger roused within him as her words flashed through his mind. 

_ “These princesses care nothing for you… They simply want the title of ‘Queen’.” _

The emissary started to respond, cutting off his thoughts.

“We look forward to our time here, King Van. Thank you for extending your courtesy to Cesario.” 

* * *

The celebrations that began the day after Cesario’s arrival were a bleak affair. At least for Van they were. His ear was talked off by various Cesarian advisors and officers, and the emissaries, of course. He plastered false smiles on his face and partook in discussions like the good little king his own Generals and advisors expected him to be. They were lucky that he indulged them thusly. Truth be told the palace looked extraordinary, decked out in elaborate decor, every nook and cranny cleaned to perfection. Elegant swaths of foliage and flowers adorned various places. Silk banners displaying Fanelia’s coat of arms and other imagery graced the walls. The guards all wore their finest armor, the staff neatly dressed. He vaguely acknowledged the opulence but was too uninterested in the events to wholeheartedly care. A little nagging voice that sounded suspiciously like Merle told him that he needed to generously thank the palace overseers for their hard work once the festivities were over. It wasn’t until later that evening that Van finally felt a good reason to be there, entertaining his guests. 

“Oh, His Royal Highness, King Van Fanel of Fanelia.” 

The familiar voice behind him, with just the barest hint of mocking that only Van could hear, drew his attention away from the group of Cesarian Generals he had been talking with, his heart leaping in his chest at the sound of it. Spinning around, Van saw the owner of the voice standing before him, bowed over an arm in a respectful greeting.

“Allen!” The blond knight rose back to his full height, his handsome face ripe with a smile. Where once he towered over Van, the Fanelian King’s head now came up to Allen’s chin. Van had grown like a beanstalk over the last five years, but it seemed he had finally met his cap. “I didn’t think you’d be able to make it.” 

“I arrived this morning, but you were too busy getting ready for the festivities that I didn’t have an opportunity to come see you until now.” The two men grasped arms, their eyes alight in their glee at seeing the other, and then they hugged roughly. Van paid his advisors no heed as they tried to hide their sneers at the display.

“I’m glad you came. I hate these things,” Van admitted in a low voice, referring to the party going on around him. Allen wore a knowing grin. “I know Dryden and Millerna came; kind of surprised they found the time. Did anyone else tag along with you?”

“Oh, don’t fret; the gang’s mostly all here. Dryden had been wanting an excuse to leave the capitol. You know how he dislikes being stuck in the same place for too long, king of Asturia or not. Princess Eries did not come; she’s never been one for parties, either. The crew tagged along too,” he informed Van, referring to the  _ Crusade _ .

“And your sister?” 

“Yes, Celena came, as well. She’s been wanting to see Fanelia again since her last visit and begged me to let her come.”

“Excellent. I’m so glad you all came.”

“You don’t seem as excited for Princess Gianna’s arrival,” he teased, and Van shot him a glare. “She is your guest of honor; have you even spoken to her yet, or just her emissaries?” Van pursed his lips. 

“I haven’t quite had the pleasure, yet.” Allen laughed.

“And I’m sure that’s the way you want it.” 

“Shut it, Allen,” the king grumbled. “It’s not like you’re making any progress in acquiring a bride for yourself.” 

“Ah, my dear, Van, I’m not a king like you. It doesn’t really matter whether or not I marry and produce an heir any time soon.”  _ Another heir, you mean,  _ Van silently corrected the Caeli Knight, but of course made no mention of that here. Allen placed a hand on his shoulder and gave it a squeeze, reminding him of Saburo from the other day. “Don’t look so grim, Van. Try enjoying yourself for a change.”

“People keep telling me that…” he replied, his expression troubled. Allen rose a brow at the look he wore, but Van shook his head, dismissing it for now. “We can speak in private later once all this ridiculousness is over with. I still have my  _ kingly duties _ to attend to.” Allen smirked at that comment, giving his shoulder another pat.

“The others should be around here, someplace. Make sure you say ‘Hello’ to everyone.” With that, Allen excused himself. Van, wanting to protest his departure so soon, had the chance stolen from him.

“Your Majesty.” Van turned to look at the small group approaching him. 

_ Damn you, Allen. _ Van could see the smirk he was undoubtedly wearing in his mind. The group of both Fanelian and Cesarian advisors and generals stopping before him gave the king small bows. 

“My Lord, Princess Gianna has requested a moment of your time if you might grant it to her. She has been most eager to make your acquaintance.” Van made himself look approachable and not annoyed.

“Of course, I would be happy to.”

They led the king to a balcony where the princess awaited him. The night sky, strewn with diamond dust, presented itself as he stepped out into the cool, spring evening, the Mystic Moon and her smaller companion hanging in the dark expanse. Below, the kingdom stretched out, hugging the sides of the valley, and little orange lights illuminated the rows of buildings. Van couldn’t help the sense of accomplishment and affection that swelled within him each time he looked out over his kingdom. Princess Gianna stood near the edge of the balcony, flanked by some guards. The sight of her quelled the joy in his heart.

“Princess Gianna, My Lord,” the emissary introduced with a low bow. After rising back up he made a little gesture with his hand and the guards stepped away from her, filing off of the balcony and stopping to stand guard at the entrance. Gianna stepped forwards and gave him a low curtsey in greeting, head dipping down; the ornaments embellishing her hair and her other precious accessories glittered prettily in the moonlight and the flames of the sconces that hung from the walls behind him. 

“King Van Fanel of Fanelia,” she greeted as she had been taught to greet royalty since birth. “I’m so honored to be blessed by your presence. I was just admiring the splendor of your kingdom.” Her voice, not quite demure, but certainly schooled for such occasions, had that same lovely lilting tone one expects of all princesses. As she rose back up Van continued the pleasantries, stepping up to meet her. He delicately took her offered hand into his, bowing over it slightly and bringing it to his lips to leave a fleeting kiss against the pristine white gloves she sported. Her hand felt small and fragile in his own with the barest detection of a tremble. 

“Princess Gianna, the honor is mine. I’m happy to hear you find our kingdom to your liking.” Her cheeks flushed a faint shade of red he could still detect in the low lighting as he released her hand and met her eyes once more. If she had sought to find flattery from him, perhaps a comparison of her own beauty to his kingdom, she would be disappointed. If she harbored any he could not see it on her face, though he was sure it lingered in her heart, royalty being accustomed to such adulations as they were. 

“Yes, My Lord. Fanelia is lovely. I’d love to see more of it; perhaps the countryside, as well?” There was hope there in her eyes, and he knew she meant for him to escort her personally. 

“I will have a tour arranged for you and your convoy, Princess. My guide for such occasions would be pleased to show you all the hidden beauties of Fanelia.” The guide would also deter the Princess from ever wanting to return to Fanelia, Van knew, just as she had the last three princesses who visited. Or, considering her still brewing anger at him, maybe she wouldn’t. It was obvious in his speech that he himself would not be accompanying them, and this time the disappointment showed on Gianna’s face. 

“I would like that very much, My Lord,” she answered him regardless. 

“The night is still young and there is plenty left of the festivities for you to enjoy, Princess. Might I suggest you head back inside?” Gianna parted her lips to speak, obviously a little surprised that he was ending their meeting after such a brief interaction. She hesitated when the music coming from inside started up louder in the tempo of a piece he knew was meant for dancing. Van cursed to himself. He saw a flash of joy race across her features as she looked past him and into the palace once more.

“I love this song,” Gianna admitted, a little smiling gracing her mouth, speaking to herself he realized. Her eyes widened a bit, realizing that she had indeed spoken that out loud, her cheeks flushing a little darker. 

“Is it from Cesario?” Van asked, and she nodded her head. 

“It is, My Lord. It’s not as popular these days at court, but I still love it, nonetheless.” Silence stretched between them, and Van was going to reiterate his earlier suggestion. But Gianna, more bold than he would have first given her credit for, asked him for something that he as the king should have been the one to request of her. She probably realized that he wouldn’t, and took the opportunity into her own hands. She jumped up a few pegs in his book from being a simple, docile princess, expected to behave by tradition, to a young woman who clearly had a little bit of a rebellious streak within her. Such was strengthened by the twinkle of determination in her eyes and her forward request. 

“I know it is bold of me to ask, My Lord, but… I would be honored to share a dance with you.” Her face was still flushed but her eyes held his courageously. Perhaps she had heard the rumors of the previous unsuccessful visits by the other princesses and knew she’d only find herself in that same boat if she placated his indifference. Perhaps her advisors had, as well, and encouraged such advances on her end. But he did not think she would be so forward if she hadn’t truly wanted to, regardless of any advice from her advisors. There were other kingdoms than his own she could choose to marry into; he was hardly her only choice. Van couldn’t help the smirk that tugged at his lips, genuinely delighted by this change in her demeanor. He had no patience for a woman who did everything exactly as she was instructed to, weak willed and totally subservient to the men around her. Gianna’s eyes widened a bit more at the reaction, thinking he’d refuse her offer, no doubt. He stepped a bit closer and silently asked for her hand in acceptance, Gianna staring up at him, breathless.

_ I’m going to regret this later, I’m sure. _

“A dance it is, then.”

* * *

_ "King Van is dancing with the Princess!” _

_ “He never did that with the others.” _

_ “Oh, happy day! Perhaps this is finally the one!” _

_ “Let’s pray that it is!” _

From where she stood near the wall, watching the dancing couples gracing the middle of the room, Merle tried not to frown but failed as she listened to the excited, whispering voices of the other patrons. 

_ You fool, Lord Van… _

* * *

Author’s Notes:

Yay, another chapter!

I promise that there will be action to come in this story and that it’s not all just a bunch of silly drama and forlorn hearts. Patience, my loves! We shall get there.

I don’t know anything about Karate or martial arts so yea, be nice to me lol.


	4. Indecisions

Disclaimer: I do not own Escaflowne

Chapter Four: Indecisions

Van leaned against the sill of the large, open window, looking out over the palace grounds below his personal chambers. People walked about, attending to their duties. His eyes studied the large, twisting design of the mosaic in the middle of the plaza as he awaited his guest's response. Allen accompanied him, sitting at a small table, his fingers laced before him as he watched the king, concern on his face. Like he had with Saburo, Van told Allen about the unease growing in his heart. He hoped the knight would indulge his worries more than his captain had.

"I don't know, Van… We've been at peace for the last five years. Zaibach is but a remnant, the capital deserted with Dornkirk gone. We all still have our people there, rummaging through the ruins. They've been gathering a lot of information. Collecting the remaining Alseides. Taking back whatever they think might be hazardous and destroying the rest so it can't fall into the wrong hands. I've been there myself countless times."

"I'm aware, Allen… It's not just the ruins of Zaibach that trouble me. I know I don't have any evidence, it's just a… gut feeling." Allen pursed his lips together more tightly as he eyed the profile of his friend's face. Van's gut feelings had paid off in the past; Allen didn't want to discredit him completely, but gut feelings would not be enough to coerce the other countries into anymore action, not when they all had people there to watch over things. And it wasn't like the other kingdoms of Gaea where foolish enough to turn a blind eye to the goings on of their lands. They may be at peace, but they were still keeping watch.

"What would you have me do, Van? I'm not Fanelian. I have my own king to answer to." Van finally looked back at him, a simmering anger showing on his face.

"I would have you tell Dryden. Tell _your_ king," he answered as if this were the obvious course of action. Allen sighed, untangling his fingers to rub at his face with them. "We can tell him together, right now."

"Dryden and Millerna are on the tour you prepared for Princess Gianna. They wanted to get outside for some fresh air after their journey from Palas."

"Then we'll tell him when they return." Allen wore a face of uncertainty.

"Even Dryden may not take your worries seriously, Van. You know he still has countless informants and ties with the merchants of Gaea. No suspicions have been brought to our attention... Why not wait until you have something more substantial? Send out some of your own scouts to survey the lands. You've acquired some aircraft. Put them to use." It was obvious this was not the answer the king wanted to hear from him if the frown he sported was any indication. "I'm sorry, Van. It's not that I don't trust your intuition, I simply don't want to cause unneeded worry without the proper evidence. You understand, don't you?" Van didn't answer, looking away from him again and out the window, trying to harness his frustrations before he could say something he shouldn't.

"Yea. Sure. I understand," he finally replied, his words betraying the disappointment and irritation he felt. Allen fought the urge to sigh and roll his eyes at the response. Instead, he rose up from his seat and went to join Van at the window, leaning against the opposing side. Van did not look his way, still staring out onto the plaza below.

"I'm serious, Van. I'm not trying to blow you off, but you're gonna need some proof on your end. Send out some scouts. Do a little more digging. We don't need false anxieties after the struggle we had against Zaibach. I'd love to go myself, really, I would, but you know that's not up to me." Silence ensued, and Allen thought that Van might ignore him, but eventually the king's rigid posture slackened a little and he sighed.

"Fine. I will send out some scouts before consulting with the other countries." Relief flooded through Allen and he did his best to hide it. It wasn't as simple as that, though. Such an endeavour wasn't something that would be done in a week or two. It could take many long months or even years to scour Gaea for the information Van sought, if he even found anything worthwhile. Would he stand by until then? His more volatile behavior of late made Allen worry for him. Van wasn't stupud, but he could be rash and governed by his emotions rather than logic. Allen hoped he could keep himself preoccupied until he had answers to his concerns, good or bad. Thankfully his generals were strong willed and would help keep his head about him should Van try and do anything premature. Allen had to admit that he felt touched that Van came to him for advice before his own generals. The only other person he had told was one of his captains. Not even Merle. Though Allen was certain the cat woman knew without Van telling her that something was laying on his heart, so attuned to the king she was; even if a small rift had seemed to form between them if her avoidance of Van over the last handful of days of Allen being there was any indication. But that seemed like too fresh a subject to breach and he left it be for now.

"Very wise."

Another length of silence stretched between them, but this time not as tense. Allen glanced at the king from his peripheral, trying to gauge his mood, now. His mulish expression had softened, but trouble still brewed in his eyes. Allen purposefully changed the subject away from the worry gnawing at Van's heart.

"So… what's your opinion of the Princess?" he dared to ask. It was another touchy subject, but the only other one he could think to discuss. Rather than the annoyance he anticipated, Van's expression remained rather the same.

"She's different from the others," he commented after another bit of silence, but his blasé tone of voice left little for Allen to interpret.

"Oh? How so?" the knight prodded, hoping for a bit of elaboration. Van surprisingly indulged him.

"She's bold… and not afraid to take things into her own hands."

"Ooh," Allen quipped with a knowing smile of realization. "So _that's_ how she got you to dance with her," he teased. Van glanced warningly at him. "You two made a lovely couple. The entire room was in a frenzy of excitement."

"It was merely a dance; I did it out of decorum." He didn't sound very convincing.

"I don't know, Van. I'd hazard a guess and say that it was more than mere decorum. Even I know that you've never danced with any of the other princesses. You looked quite taken by her." Van made a noise of dismissal.

"She merely caught me off guard with her bravery and I impulsively rewarded her."

"You've never acted so impulsively with the others. She sounds like she could be a good match for you, Van." The king made a short 'hmm' of acknowledgment, but Allen couldn't tell if he was agreeing or not to the statement. _She sounds a lot like a certain someone,_ Allen couldn't help but think to himself, but was clever enough not to say that thought aloud to the cantankerous king. "Well, she'll be in Fanelia for a good number of days. You'll have plenty of time to reward impulse while she's here." Van gave him another look of warning but Allen only grinned, unfazed by the icy glare.

* * *

_She walked through the midst of the ruins surrounding her. In her heart she felt something calling out; she could not ignore it, like a sailor drawn to the siren's song, a moth to the flames of a fire. She was in the Mystic Valley, the ancient city of Atlantis. It was too unique to not recognize even if her visit there had been brief. Clear, beautiful skies stretched out above her; everything was tranquil, but in her heart she felt dread creeping in. Despite it, she continued onward. Eventually she found herself at the monument containing Atlantian writing. The same spot her and her friends once stood before all those years ago. As she studied it, she felt something in the air shift. Suddenly the skies above began to grow dark, angry clouds rolling in to block out the sun. Her eyes widened and she turned around, only to see the ruins ablaze in fire. Fear replaced confusion. Corpses were scattered around her, now; as always their eyes were fixed upon her, accusation in their soulless depths. Her mouth opened in a painful gasp, face drawn in agony at the sight. And then she saw it: atop a distant hill it loomed, as dark and ominous in shape and mass as it always was, unmoving except for the toiling smoke and flames that cloaked it. Her legs buckled and she fell to the ground, eyes never leaving the monstrosity._

" _No, please," she heard herself begging, voice but a whisper. "Don't do it…" Despite the plea, the titan moved, as if beckoned by her words. Slowly it drew near as it marched its way down the hill towards her, and all she could do was watch in horror until it towered over her, the two crimson lights of its eyes fixated on her trembling form. A hand larger than her, engulfed in trailing tendrils of hazy smoke, reached out for her. She wanted to cry out, but her strength was stolen, any noise halted by the terror that froze her in her spot, leaving her paralyzed. Only when the wicked, smoldering claws were about to ensnare her did she finally remember how to breath, and a scream tore out from her throat as she called out for rescue..._

Hitomi lay in bed staring up at her ceiling again, her skin sleek with sweat, as she fought to rid the nightmare from her mind. That the dream took place on Atlantis worried her; none of the others had before. In fact, none of her surroundings in her other dreams had been recognizable until now. What significance did that hold? That she dreamt of Atlantis must have meant something more profound, didn't it? Something was amiss; something terrible, something-

Hitomi closed her eyes, letting out a tired breath. _They're just dreams… they're just dreams..._ Her attempts to force the nightmare away with other thoughts were failing, so she reluctantly let her mind wade in the pool of happy memories about Gaea to usher out the fear. Not the healthiest of habits, but she couldn't help herself. Nothing else was working. As she often did, she eventually found herself lingering on the day of her departure and the last words she and Van had shared. Rather than settle her heart, it made the turmoil worse.

" _But we can see each other anytime, right? So long as our thoughts reach each other."_

"What a load of crap," Hitomi mumbled aloud. At that time when she first returned to Earth, Hitomi had secretly wished that those words had meant something more meaningful than mere sentiment. That somehow their thoughts were connected, that she and Van could still communicate with one another despite being on different planets, in different realms of existence. In all the years to follow, though, her mind had been her own. All she had had were fleeting images of him like mirages. At first they had been comforting, like he was checking in on her, even if they were merely figments of her imagination. Then they slowly haunted her, gnawing at her heart as she tried to forget about Gaea and dispel that longing within her to see him again, until they finally disappeared and she only saw him in her dreams or in her memories. And for a time she found herself able to move on, only thinking of Gaea periodically, or dreaming the occasional dream. When the nightmares started, though, her every waking thought seemed to revolve around the planet - around him - no matter how much she fought it; no matter how much she tried to tell herself these nightmares were simply dreams and nothing more. And sometimes out of habit, even to this day, Hitomi found herself trying to reach up to grasp at the pendant that once hung about her neck to bring herself comfort, only to have to reface the reality of its absence again and again. Without realizing it, the tears she thought she got back under control suddenly sprang forth, burning her eyes and trailing down her face to stain her pillow.

"Damn… I'm pathetic."

* * *

"Hitomi, dear… Are you sure you're okay?"

The worried voice of her mother made Hitomi purse her lips. In all these months that the nightmares had been plaguing her, Hitomi hadn't told anyone about them; not even her mother. Regardless, Hitomi could tell her mother knew something was wrong. But for the same reasons she didn't tell Yukari, she had also withheld the truth from her mother. She didn't want to make her worry even more than she already did. But with the nightmares haunting her slumbering mind with more and more frequency, and the dark circles that rimmed Hitomi's eyes growing more visible with each visit, she knew she wouldn't be able ward off her mother's concern much longer. Emerald eyes watched as the other woman bent down to set a steaming cup of tea before her on the coffee table that occupied the living room with them. Mrs. Kanzaki joined her on the couch, her hands holding her own cup.

"I know you don't want to worry me, darling, but I can tell something's been on your mind. You seem more and more tired with each visit. I'm your mother, Hitomi. You know you can always talk to me about anything." Hitomi's brows furrowed a bit in appreciation as her heart swelled within her. She was blessed to have a mother like her's. Leaning forward to grab the tea her mother prepared, she took a calming sip after blowing the steam away. Nostalgia washed over her at the flavor. There was something about the special touch of a mother that made everything taste better, even if she made her tea the same exact way her mom had taught her to. Such sentiments helped her let her guard down a bit. It was time to tell someone, and who better than her mother.

"Well, I… I've been having these… _nightmares_ , lately." Her mother wore a troubled expression, pausing from the sip she was about to take herself.

" _Nightmares?"_ her mother parroted back. Hitomi nodded.

"Yeah… about Gaea." A knowing expression flashed across Mrs. Kanzaki's face. She had had a feeling it had something to do with that other world her daughter once visited.

"What kind of nightmares?" her mother ventured to ask. By the haunting look pulling at her daughter's face, she wasn't sure if she really wanted to know, but she couldn't help herself. As Hitomi closed her eyes, reliving the dreams in her mind, Mrs. Kanzaki's heart ached for the young woman.

" _Horrible_ ones," she admitted, trying to keep the fear and tears at bay within her, her eyes still shut. "Of war… death… destruction… And an unknown guymelef. Not Escaflowne. I'm not sure what it is. It's always covered in fire and smoke, but I can tell it's a guymelef." Hitomi didn't have the heart to describe her dreams in completion, wanting to spare her mother the gruesome details. Her eyes reopened, but she didn't meet her mother's gaze, looking down at her cup, instead.

"How long have you been having them?" her mother asked after a little silence.

"Months, now… Since a little after the beginning of the school year."

"You've been having them for that long? Hitomi… it's March. Why didn't you say anything sooner?" Hitomi made a face and carefully shrugged her shoulders so as to not spill her tea.

"They weren't that bad at first; weren't that frequent. I didn't put much thought into them. It's not like I haven't had nightmares, before. But now, I'm having them throughout the week. They wake me up early in the morning, and I can never fall back asleep. Sometimes I'm afraid to even go to bed, and stay up late into the night." Mrs. Kanzaki frowned deeply. No wonder Hitomi looked more and more haggard each time she saw her.

"Oh, darling…" But Mrs. Kanzaki fell silent, unsure of what to say. Unsure of how to put her daughter at ease. Hitomi finally risked a glance at her mother.

"I know they're just dreams, but… they're _so vivid_. They're too much like the visions I used to have. I worry about Gaea… about…" Hitomi trailed off, but her mother knew her well enough to finish the unspoken sentence and who in particular her daughter fretted over. "I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm going crazy. Do I go see a doctor? Get a prescription? I've tried everything else I can think of… and I'm _scared_. Scared that they're real. Scared I'll have to go back and find Gaea consumed by war. I can't go through that, again. Once was too much. I can't go back to that." Her eyes were glistening with unshed tears by the time she finished speaking, nearly out of breath as the words rushed out from her mouth. She looked at her mother with despair in her eyes. "Mom… I don't know what to do." Mrs. Kanzaki was again at a loss for words. All she could do was to sit her cup of tea down, take the one from her daughter's trembling hands as well, and offer the girl the comfort of her embrace. Hitomi needed no prompting to draw near, and Mrs. Kanzaki gently stroked her daughter's head, trying to sooth away her worries.

"They're just dreams, Hitomi; it's okay," her mother finally consoled. Like her daughter, she wanted to desperately believe that to be true. "It's been eight years since then. And you no longer have grandmother's pendant. You have no way of returning there." _Hitomi can't go back to Gaea… she's meant to be here, on Earth…_ "I know these dreams are upsetting, especially if they seem so real. But they're just dreams; nothing more. If they're worrying you that much, then you should go see your doctor. Maybe something to help you sleep at night would be for the best." She felt Hitomi nod her head in agreement against her.

"Yeah… I think I will… Thanks, mom."

* * *

The cold winter breeze that swept through Fanelia kissed the exposed skin of his face. Above him the pregnant, dark clouds looked ready to drop more snow at any moment. He stared dispassionately at the slumbering guymelef where he sat on the frigid steps of his brother's shrine, trying to ignore the cold that seeped into him. Once again he was neglecting his duties, seeking the solitude of the shrine. Ever since Princess Gianna's arrival earlier in the spring, Merle never came looking for him there. In fact, they rarely spoke these days. He told himself that he wasn't disappointed each time she failed to show up wherever he went to hide from his advisors and the generals. During any of their interactions she remained indifferent towards him. He still found it novel after her undying loyalty throughout the years, but was still too irate with her and pretended not to care even if it hurt.

Her attempts to scare Gianna away hadn't worked. The Cesarian princess kept surprising Van with her tenacity. After her departure from Fanelia she returned again in the summer and then once more in the fall. With winter here, she was due to return once more next spring when the weather was not so treacherous. Both kingdoms were hopeful, longing to move forward with marriage arrangements. Although he had not outright said it, his actions had been enough incentive for his advisors to ready themselves for the process. Each time they made plans for her return Van made no protests and continued to grace her with his favor; indulging her in dances, in conversation, in strolls through his kingdom and the countryside. Sending her back home with parting gifts. Writing her return letters to the ones she sent to him. There was no talk of love. No real romance between them, but rather a growing friendship. Gianna was patient; she knew what she wanted from the king, even if he pretended he didn't know what it was he wanted. She never specifically expressed in words her growing fondness of him, but she didn't have to for Van to know. She said it in underhand comments. Showed it in the way she acted around him. And the fact that Van sanctioned more visits was enough for the princess to know where she stood with him. Not once had Merle spoken to him about Gianna, but he knew how she felt about the princess without needing to ask. Everyone else was happy for him, encouraging the king to finally marry. Gianna now knew the king well enough to know her continued visits weren't meaningless, even if he was slow to show the affections she desired from him. It seemed that Fanelia would finally acquire a new queen after many, long years.

Since he admitted to Allen that trouble lurked in his heart and mind, Van did as he said he would and prepared scouts to survey Gaea. Sent spies to various kingdoms and far away lands, trying to garner any hints of news. Any sort of suspicious activity. But in the months to follow, no such worries had been found, and no ill news came from those watching over Zaibach. Van would have been relieved if not for the still lingering doubt that pestered him like a bothersome gnat. But like Allen requested of him, Van kept his worries to himself without the proper evidence. He continued to deploy his scouts despite the lack of suspicions. Not as many as he first did, but enough to put his mind at ease. It was this lack of evidence that perhaps swayed his heart into thoughts of matrimony. That and the continued reassurances made by Allen and Saburo and their never-ending advice to finally enjoy himself and this new age of peace were wearing him down.

Van looked to the pendant hanging from his fingers, a frown tugging at his lips at the sight of it. Despair filled his heart, indecision gnawing away at him since spring. Since his growing relationship with Gianna. The last real conversation he had had with Merle.

It was time to move on.

Gaea was at peace, and he should enjoy it. Holding on to the pendant meant holding onto the past. Holding onto _her._ Like he had told Merle, Hitomi was gone. He needed to start acting like it. Squaring his jaw, Van rose from his place on the steps and approached the dormant, kneeling guymelef. He nimbly climbed up its left, bent leg, careful not to slip on any clinging ice, to stand before the large gem on its chest. Looking back down at the pendant, he clutched his fingers around the smooth stone, closing his eyes tightly.

_I'm sorry… You told me that you'd never forget me, and in my heart I promised you the same. But time is moving on… You're on the Mystic Moon, where you should be. I can't keep waiting for you to come back. My heart can't handle the continued disappointment with each passing year. Please, don't think ill of me… I pray you're doing well… I pray that I'm not causing you the same heartache…_

Opening his eyes, Van fought the burning in his nose. Reaching out to the large gem on the guymelef's chest, he reached past the membrane and inside, gently setting the pendant within the cavity where an energist would remain. The odd sensation of sliding his arm back out sent a little shiver through him that had nothing to do with the frigid air. He looked at the pendant sitting innocently inside for a moment longer, until he forced himself to turn away. Jumping down from the leg and into the icy, snow covered grass below with a crunch, Van looked back up to the gem, and told himself he wasn't disappointed that Escaflowne remained still, and nothing seemed to change. A sigh escaped him, his breath visible in a puff of steam until it wisped away.

"Keep it safe for me, Escaflowne," he asked the still dormant guymelef. Escaflowne merely looked ahead, still and silent, and Van turned and left the shrine before he lost his resolve.

* * *

Author's Notes:

I hope everyone had a pleasant Thanksgiving. I know this year is different, but I still feel like we have much to be thankful for.

Cheers. :)


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